I have heard several stories of romance and of love. I have listened to my friends crying and joking about love. I even heard people dying for love. But what is love and what is the motivation for a human being behind this emotion.
Love is a complex word. This can describe a lot of feelings for one person and perhaps a different set to another. People fall, get hurt and even destroyed in love. Love can be of several types – brotherly, maternal, paternal and general all time love. I want to examine the love what we have with opposite sex. Called too often as Romance what exactly is this feeling.
Charles Finney, I believe said “The innate nature of all human beings is selfishness”. I think this is correct in case of love. We all are selfish in many things and if we dig deep enough we find that we are selfish in everything. The same applies for love also. When we see a beautiful member of the opposite sex, we feel the so called “love” because we are selfish. Now I am sure to get lot of “No way” s for this. But deep down let’s analyze this feeling that we have.
You see some one beautiful your mind, conscious or unconscious is attracted to this person, and what is this attraction. Perhaps you like the way this person smiled at you, perhaps the way he/she dresses up, perhaps the way they talked to you and made you feel better when you were down. So you see, you like a person based on what you want and upon your parameters. The way you like, the way you feel or the way you see – the “YOU” is constant here. You are selfish in your needs and demand that you see and like or get attracted to or Love only what that makes “you” happy.
So the next time some one says – mine is true love based on mutual respect and I cannot imagine a moment without him / her you can see how selfish this can be. Love as an emotion and as something which makes you feel nice should not be based on selfishness, but rather a clear need and want. We lack this in today’s world and for most of us love is some thing that happens with any other person we find attractive. If that fails we might be hurt since our need was not filled, but we fall back at some point again back into the game.
